Comparisons. Competition. Thievery. Envy. Lying. Denial. Insecurity. Every day we hide ourselves, we put on a mask when we step out of the door, we belittle ourselves and one another. Sometimes we look at another person and wish we were them, other times we just wish that we were anyone but ourselves. Some people steal another person’s idea or story and try to pass it off as their own in order to build up their own reputation. A lot of people tell themselves, if they could just beat this person, they’d move up some invisible ladder to take their place.
Humans are not a line. They are self-contained circles. You cannot replace another person. You occupy a certain time, space, and body that only you are able to move along. There’s a saying “everything in its time and place.” What this means is that there is no need for duplicates. Reality is one whole and there is no need for anything extra. All that is here, will be here, and long gone exists as a potential across the entire universe. Nature always chooses the path of least resistance. Nature is efficient. It provides everything necessary.
So why do we behave as if none of this is true? It is an actual denial of reality when we duplicate or seek to duplicate what has already been done. Creation is a process of bringing something completely new into the picture. We are blessed and equipped with minds that can create new angles of sight on any problem, obstacle, or project. When we take the “easy way out” and shut down the active part of our brains, nature responds in kind.
What this means is that nature waits for you to choose then responds appropriately. If you seek to create anew then opportunities spring up everywhere. Like a farmer, you must learn to tend your garden. If your mind is a tangled web running through the same ground repeatedly without providing nourishment, the land will die, your mind will shut down, and you will be depressed, apathetic, or reactionary. Every single moment is an opportunity to choose: for better or worse. We are scientists in our own lives due to the fact that we can assess our actions and their results. When a mind stops doing this, any random force can rush in and destroy the garden.
What most people think is the easy way out is actually just the longest path around. When they shrink away, hide within themselves, and deny responsibility they are actually saying, “I agree with any random thing happening to me.” Saying “I don’t care,” opens the door for the odds to fall as they may. The odds have no reason to fall in our favor. When you reject reality, it rejects anything you say you want. These same people will complain about how life sucks, how nothing ever good happens to them, and how they wish they were anyone else. It is an act of erasure to deny your own existence. To say that you have no control over your life or your choices is a denial of your mind and soul. Why should the universe take care of you if you don’t even admit you’re aware of it or you think that you are a mistake?
I used to wish I unexisted. I wished I had never lived. I was literally cancelling myself out, committing spiritual suicide and trying to commit bodily suicide. Hence a whole series of contradictions managed to sneak in, weeds destroying the crops of my mind. However, even when we say these hurtful things, to ourselves and one another, we are missing a fairly obvious point. The one question you need to continually ask yourself is “Who is saying this? Who is wishing for another life?” No matter what, there is always an “I” behind every thought. You are still the one doing the thinking, the wishing, the denying.
The ever-wise Iyanla has a saying, “When you compare yourself to others, it is an act of violence against the self.” Every time you say something hateful, every time you covet what someone else has, every time you deny your choice or your existence it is equivalent to stabbing yourself repeatedly. A wounded person cannot move very far or very well. You are disabling yourself when you spend time thinking of these things. You are literally damaging yourself and making your life harder to live. How? By setting your perceptual filters to block out those things which you really need, desire, and can do. You strip yourself of any other choices that will lead to a better life. You literally become unable to learn or to see an alternative. This is how a mind dies.
This is why it helps to be as a farmer. Your mind is your garden; it needs the proper food. That proper food is reality itself. Humans are able to interact with reality and solidify potentials because of evolution. It is the one thing that we are specially built for. Our consciousness allows us to imagine things that never existed before and then enables us to produce it with our bodies. How fascinating is that? However this tool works best, nearly flawlessly, as long as we are paying attention and acknowledging what is actually there. How can we grasp anything else in the world if we are too busy cancelling ourselves out or seeking to duplicate someone else? That person is already them, and already being themselves well enough, what need does the universe have for another copy? We are unique for a reason, because (like Liam Neeson) we all have a very particular set of skills.
Each of us has a unique point of view and therefore we each have different choices to make, different paths to follow, and different abilities to employ. All that we accomplish by denying ourselves and coveting other’s goods or abilities is burning down a perfectly good garden. When we lie in any way, by saying we aren’t good enough or stealing someone’s idea or wanting their life, we are denying the truth, reality, the entire universe. That’s a pretty bold contradiction: assuming that you are such a wasted plant, that the universe messed up so badly with you, while asserting that you actually could do better. That is the hidden thought behind any denial; I could make myself better than the entire cosmos did.
So instead of telling the world what a bad place it is for sending you the life you have and are continuing to create, acknowledge that you are a unique creation. You have the choice to change the settings by which you operate. You have the ability to improve your mind’s capability to recognize reality. That is what learning is. When you get in your own way you deny your lesson. You shut off the food source that allows you to grow. You are telling reality it has nothing to give you; that you receive no benefit from it. And somehow we find ourselves still surprised that we receive no benefits after that. It is a sick cycle when we ask reality to just skip over us because we’d rather be anywhere else.
The easiest path is the truth. Tell it, see it, learn about it.That’s why science works so well; it seeks reality as it is and in return people can benefit from it by emulating the act of creation. When we start with the simplest truth, “I exist” we can follow it to further freedom of choice. There is no need to duplicate another person when we realize our own abilities. There is no need to adopt their property, ideas, or mannerisms if we see that our own is what we chose and what we have to work with. It is difficult to take account of what you really have at your disposal if you refuse to acknowledge yourself. Use your energy to tend to your own garden and you will not need to take over someone else’s, in any form. Be a good farmer. To want someone else’s life or property is to assume information you don’t have, information that may be inaccurate. You know your own life best and that will provide the best results.
When you find yourself thinking that being someone else would be easier, that having what they have would make you better, that you have to hide some part of yourself because it’s not okay; look for the truth and hang on as hard as you can. You always have a choice about how you feel, what you think about, and what you look for. If you want similar things for your life concentrate on how to obtain them honestly. Wishing yourself into their position just serves to cancel yourself out. Your mind may be hard to change at first (a garden can only grow what’s been sown). As you introduce new ideas, truths, and reality your mind will be able to put together new connections (the new plants need the time to grow). Give your attention to those ideas which affirm your existence, abilities, and worth. Gradually give more food to these and the old plants and weeds will eventually die (though there is always that one weed that keeps growing back). As time goes on, you’ll get better and better at this and wonder how you ever thought yourself so worthless that you didn’t deserve to be you. Remember, you can always tell yourself no, instead of telling the world no. You can look at that duplicating urge and choose to create something new instead. Creation begets creation. Denial (of self or learning) begets denial (of opportunities). I do hope this made sense. I also hope it helps. Please let me know what you think or share a comment if you have any examples of duplication you’d like to share.